Where I Live

Where I Live…

I live in a small town in GA about 30 miles east of Atlanta.

Where I live…

Wal Mart was voted as the best place to buy women’s clothes.

You can’t take a cell phone inside a county office.

Getting a drivers license takes 6 hours and 15 minutes. One hour to drive to the DMV, four hours to wait, 15 minutes to get the license, and one hour to drive home.  

English is rarely spoken at the DMV.

Kids go to college on the HOPE Scholarship which is funded by the lottery. Their parents are grateful to the people of AL for their contributions.

The local newspaper is published twice a week—once more than in Opp.

The Atlanta Journal Constitution’s Sunday edition can be purchased at Wal-Mart on Saturday.

Around the corner, an above-ground pool has pine trees growing in the deep end.

A subdivision is defined as new houses on a paved street in what was a pasture just last month.  

Gas is cheaper than in AL because of fewer gas taxes.

State legislators make fun of AL then pass laws that would embarrass Alabamians.

Buddhists in Atlanta got upset because their leader had sex and a credit card.

The governor’s daughter divorced her husband to marry a state trooper. The legislature is working on a law to strengthen marriage.

You have to carefully time when you will drive through Atlanta.

The Waffle House on GA 316 is non-smoking.

North Georgia and South Georgia are as different as North Alabama and South Alabama.

Bold Springs, our little community, has two churches (Methodist and Baptist), a gas station, a tree farm, and a recycling center. We go to the Methodist church because the bathrooms are conveniently located near the sanctuary.

Six Flags hired lobbyists to pressure state legislators to force schools to open closer to Labor Day. It didn’t work.

There are a gazillion pine trees.  

To celebrate Black History Month, the Atlanta Journal Constitution investigated the Martin Luther King Center. Seems that the place needs millions in repairs, has few employees, no real programs, and supports MLK’s sons with six figure incomes. I don’t think that was Martin’s dream.

Our neighborhood celebrates the Fourth of July with a tractor parade.

The governor, a veterinarian by trade, recently neutered a dog. He claimed it was in support of spay/neuter week, but I think he was trying to scare his political opponents.

Ashley Smith has written a book about her escape from the guy who killed courthouse personnel in Atlanta. First she claimed to have given him “A Purpose Driven Life.” Now we learn it was really crystal meth.

The runaway bride was really running away from writing 600 thank- you notes.

And the other day an official with Homeland Security arrested two vegans protesting outside Honeybaked Ham. He must have been an anti-hamite.

We like it here but are looking forward to your visit.